


The Ghosts That Move About

by hanorganaas



Series: 1_Million_Words Challenges and What Not. [3]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Community: 1_million_words, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode Tag, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-17
Updated: 2013-04-17
Packaged: 2017-12-08 19:23:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/765094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanorganaas/pseuds/hanorganaas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve was used to loss. He had dealt with it many times before. 3x20 Coda</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Ghosts That Move About

Steve was used to loss. He had dealt with it many times before. 

When he was 16 he lost his mother, well thought he did. He remembered standing at her “funeral” pupils blown, his teeth grazing on his bottom lip. But he didn’t cry…not even when they lowered her casket down into the earth. He just couldn’t find it in him. Even when he found out his mother was alive all along, he felt guilty about not showing his pain. 

Almost half a lifetime later his dad died. He never knew what was more painful, the fact both his parents were gone or the fact he was helpless as he heard his father’s death on the phone. There were days even years later he closes his eyes and vividly remembers. All the vivid details come alive, the sound of the gun, his father’s last pained grunt and his own anguished scream echoing through the South Korean wilderness. When his father was buried, he didn’t cry then either. He was an S.E.A.L and S.E.A.LS couldn’t cry, they had to stand tall even when emotionally compromised.

By the time it was confirmed that Freddie was gone…..Steve just…couldn’t handle it anymore. There was only so much one could handle. There were so many thoughts so many emotions at the loss of his good friend. All the things that would never do together….all the times he needed him to stand by his side….it would never happen….he was gone and he was never coming back.

He wanted to cry at Freddie’s funeral…but he couldn’t; he had to keep the guise of an S.E.A.L. But it was beginning to become difficult…seeing his family and the typical ceremony involved with a fallen citizen who served in the military. He couldn’t handle another minute. He turned his head away just for a moment and saw his team, the three people who became his Ohana. But above all he focused on Danny who loved him just as unconditionally as he did.

The man could read him like a book. He gave Steve a slight smile and mouthed “it’s okay”. Steve knew what he meant. He walked over to Danny and pulled him in for hug. His head buried into the crook of his neck and began sobbing. His body shook vigorously as he wailed. It felt safe to be weak…safe to feel in Danny’s arms. There was only here….only now and with Danny…he knew everything was going to be okay.


End file.
